“Today the only inventory I need to take is my own. I’ll leave judgment of others to the Final Judge — Divine Providence.”
That line from today’s Daily Reflections hit me right between the eyes. Because if I am honest, I can still catch myself running someone else’s inventory while my own checklist sits unfinished on the table. Gossip. Quiet resentment. That little scoreboard I keep in my head. They sneak in during a coffee break, a long drive, or a tired evening when my ego wants a cheap win. The Big Book tradition material puts it plainly: gossip barbed with anger is a polite form of character assassination. We are not trying to help the person we criticize. We are trying to proclaim our own righteousness. Ouch. That one is for me.
Your checklist is enough work
Recovery gave me a full life. Business. Fellowship. Hobbies. People I love. In Twenty-Four Hours a Day today, the reflection asks a beautiful question: Am I deeply grateful for what sobriety opened up, and will I desert the program because life got bigger?
No. I will not accept a diploma and graduate from gratitude. Sobriety is rented, and the rent is due every day. The fuller my life gets, the more I need the basics: inventory of me, not you. Prayer. Service. One honest day.
In Recovery Thinking, 90-Days to Change Your Life! I wrote something I still need to hear: “That is not who you are; that is what you have done!” If that is true for me, it has to be true for the person I am tempted to judge. Their past is not my project. My recovery is!
Cut the strings
Al-Anon’s Courage to Change gave me a picture I love. Forgiveness is not a gavel declaring someone “not guilty.” It is a pair of scissors. I use it to cut the strings of resentment that bind me to a problem or a past hurt. By releasing resentment, I free myself.
Every time I try to tighten the noose of resentment around someone else’s neck, I am really only choking myself.
In Success-Full, Living Life with Purpose: Recovery Mode, I put it even shorter: “Resentment kills!” And the antidote I practice is a simple prayer that still works: “Lord, please give them everything I want and more!” That prayer is not soft. It is freedom with teeth.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg, quoted in today’s Your Daily Reprieve, said a meaningful life is making life a little better for people less fortunate than you. One lives not just for oneself but for one’s community. That lines up with recovery. Service is the price, a small price for the return! Life is good!!!
What does your life advertise?
Matthew Kelly’s Dynamic Catholic reflection for today asks a hard, useful question: What does your life advertise? He points to the Gospel warning about hindering people who are trying to enter what is good and true. Sometimes we hinder others not with a big public sin, but with gossip, pride, coldness, or by doing nothing when a kind word would help.
If someone looks at my recovery and sees scorekeeping, they may not want what I have. If they see gratitude, forgiveness, and a guy who minds his own checklist, they might take a second look. Cheerleading others is part of the A-B-Cs I live by: Always Be Positive, Be a Student of Life, Cheerlead Others.
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32, ESV)
That verse is not decoration. It is a daily practice.
Five practical steps for today
- Run your list, not theirs. At day’s end, ask only: Where was I selfish, dishonest, afraid, or unkind? Leave their examination to God.
- Catch gossip early. If a conversation turns into character assassination, change the subject or exit. Your uniqueness is a blessing, and so is theirs.
- Use the scissors. Name one resentment. Pray for that person by name, asking God to give them good things. Cut the string.
- Thank God out loud for a full life. Not a vague thank you. Name three concrete gifts sobriety made possible today.
- Be a better advertisement. Do one small act that makes recovery look like freedom: a call, a ride, a note, a quiet kindness with no speech attached.
Progress, not perfection! Attaining worthwhile goals in all areas of my life starts with how I treat the person in front of me and the person in the mirror.
We can spend a lifetime keeping score of other people’s shortcomings, or we can use that energy to become the people we hope to be. Each day offers a choice: hold on to what weighs us down, or make room for gratitude, forgiveness, and faith.
Whose checklist are you working on today, yours or someone else’s?
Go, Go, Go… Dan 🙂
Reflection note: I wrote this from my own daily readings. Quotes belong to their original authors and sources (Daily Reflections / Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.; Twenty-Four Hours a Day / Hazelden Foundation; Courage to Change / Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.; Your Daily Reprieve; Dynamic Catholic Daily Gospel Reflection by Matthew Kelly; Recovery Thinking, 90-Days to Change Your Life!; Success-Full, Living Life with Purpose: Recovery Mode; Ephesians 4:32 ESV). I used AI to help organize it and reviewed it before posting. Image created with AI assistance.