An open letter to Jesus

Dear Lord Jesus:

Today I am troubled I carry a burden that is tough to let go of.  I seek freedom from this bondage.  Yes Lord, I act in behaviors that are not in congruence with your Word, I am sinful.  But no Lord that is not the burden I carry.  Yes Lord I have the propensity to over-eat at times, unfortunately in spurts often for months at a time.  However, Lord that is not the burden I carry.

Yes Lord I say things or make comments that are not becoming of my desire to speak Your Word in a way that is acceptable.  Yet that is not the burden I carry.  Yes Lord I am greedy at times and I make decisions that are selfish.  Once again Lord that is not my burden.  Yes Lord I tithe with an attitude of what will come back to me.  No Lord that is not my burden.  Yes Lord I have denied my commitment to You shamefully.  Yet no Lord this is not my burden.

Yes Lord I help others with selfish motives on my part sometimes.  Once again Father that is not my burden.  Lord, You know that I will look at a beautiful lady with a wandering heart.  Yet Lord that is not my burden that troubles me so.   Father in Heaven I am guilty of withholding the truth which is a lie of omission rather than commission.  No Lord this is not my burden.  Lord I can be lazy at times and shun my responsibilities in various ways.  Yet again this is not my burden.

Lord all of my inequities I believe that by Your Grace I am forgiven.  Yes Lord I know that You forgive me way too often.  Yes Lord I know that You are less frustrated with me than I am of myself.  Lord of Heaven and Earth I pray that You will forgive me for the burden I carry and seemingly will carry to my grave.  My burden lies in the judgment of my brothers and sisters with our fellow brothers and sisters of this Earth that are gay.  No I am not gay Lord as you know, but I carry this heavy burden for my friends.  Lord You know the hearts of my friends.  You know the burden they often carry through their childhood right on through till they come to terms with their homosexuality.

Lord how do I come to terms with the message my fellow brothers and sisters, believers of Your Word shout to the world?  Lord how do I live with myself judging a man or woman for their sexuality?  Yes Lord I have asked some of my friends if they think they are making a choice or they are born this way.  Lord most answer quickly and assuredly to me, they say, “Dan do you think I would choose to be spit on?  Beat up?  Shunned by my friends and family?  Ridiculed for my femininity or masculinity? What do you think Dan”?  I simply don’t and that is the problem Lord, how do I tell them they are sinners and not welcome in Your House?  Surely Lord I recognize that sexual promiscuity is wrong and hurtful, whether in a heterosexual or homosexual encounter.

Lord I simply wonder out loud to You, what would You suggest?  Shall I throw the first, second or last stone or do You want me to Love them as well?  Lord I believe in You, I believe in Your Word.  I beg You for forgiveness.  Yet Lord I carry a burden that simply won’t go away.  It is so much easier to accept Your forgiveness for my sinful nature and actions than it is to turn my back on my friends, the ones I know and do not know!

Lord forgive me.